Lifestyle
Why you need an anti-bucket list
What if we stopped chasing the extraordinary and started savouring the everyday? The anti-bucket list flips the script on modern achievement culture, celebrating the small, steady joys that make life feel truly rich.
By Carolyn Tate
In a world obsessed with extraordinary experiences, there's a quiet revolution going on. You might not have heard about it because it’s not all that Instagram-worthy, but it’s something you might enjoy.
Enter the anti-bucket list: a celebration of life's simple pleasures rather than grand adventures.
Unlike its more famous counterpart, the anti-bucket list embraces everyday moments that consistently bring joy – your favourite bench in a local park, that perfect cup of tea on a rainy afternoon, or the comfort of a well-worn book you come back to again and again. It’s a refreshing approach to life satisfaction that is gaining traction as people recognise that contentment often lies not in the exceptional, but in the beautifully ordinary.
The allure of the bucket list
For decades, bucket lists have dominated our cultural approach to living a fulfilling life. These aspirational inventories of must-do experiences before we "kick the bucket" often feature things like first-class trips to Europe, jumping out of an aeroplane, doing a Big Lap or meeting a celebrity hero. They promise significance through achievement and memories through extraordinary experiences.
But, as writer Matt Condon pointed out in The Australian, there's a growing awareness of the potential drawbacks to this achievement-oriented outlook.
"Bin the bucket and smell the roses," he suggested, which could be a great catch-cry for us all. Matt’s article goes on to explain how the constant pursuit of grand experiences can create unnecessary pressure and anxiety to “keep up with the Joneses”.
Traditional bucket lists can inadvertently diminish the value of our everyday lives, creating a false sense of dichotomy between those "special" moments and our "ordinary" existence. It’s an outlook that threatens to turn our lives into a series of checkboxes rather than a continuous journey of appreciation.
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Embracing the anti-bucket list
The anti-bucket list philosophy centres on embracing contentment in the present rather than chasing a checklist of grand achievements. It encourages us to find joy in ordinary moments, letting go of societal pressures, and appreciating life as it unfolds naturally.
Journalist Stephen Randall summed up this sentiment perfectly when he wrote: "Yes, the Eiffel Tower is magnificent, but so is the sandwich shop on the corner. Family, music, walks in the neighbourhood – I love those things."
It’s not that adventure and “big” experiences aren’t great – they absolutely are – and if you want to see the Eiffel Tower, you should make plans and go. But you’ll only be there for a week or two – what about the rest of your days?
This approach helps us to think about what makes our lives meaningful. It's about recognising that your morning ritual of watching birds at the garden feeder might bring as much genuine joy as standing at the top of the Eiffel Tower – and almost certainly with more consistency and accessibility.
Benefits of the anti-bucket list
Besides, there are some significant psychological advantages to adopting an anti-bucket list mentality. Research suggests that practising present-moment awareness and gratitude – core components of the anti-bucket list approach – can substantially reduce our stress and anxiety levels.
According to Psychology Today, bucket lists can lead to a focus on future achievements at the expense of present contentment. The anti-bucket list reverses this trend, reminding us to be mindful, and to appreciate what we already have in our lives.
This shift in perspective can give us a boost to our mental wellbeing. By removing the pressure to constantly achieve and acquire new experiences, study participants reported feeling more relaxed and satisfied with their current circumstances. The anti-bucket list creates space for contentment rather than constant striving.
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In her article for The Times, Ann Treneman shared her concept of a reverse bucket list. She says that by explicitly acknowledging activities we choose not to pursue – like "water-skiing, all-nighters, cartwheels" – we can free ourselves from societal expectations and embrace what we truly want.
Focusing on life's simple pleasures can bring with it a special kind of peace. There's something satisfying about noticing a new flower blooming in your garden or watching the sun rise from your back deck instead of constantly chasing the next big thrill.
Creating your own anti-bucket list
Ready for your own anti-bucket list? It all starts with some quiet reflection. Try following these steps:
- Identify everyday activities that reliably bring you joy. Maybe it's doing the Sunday crossword with your partner, tending to your herb garden, or listening to a favourite podcast. These regular activities can form the backbone of genuine contentment.
- Create a "done list": a celebration of experiences you've already enjoyed rather than those you're chasing. This practice fosters gratitude for the life you've lived rather than anxiety about what's still left to be achieved.
- Think also about what you don't want to do, which can be equally liberating. This might include saying no thanks to climbing Mount Kilimanjaro in favour of returning to your favourite Aussie beach holiday spot.
- Focus on connection rather than achievement. Relationships and community can often provide a deeper sense of meaning and satisfaction than ticking off experiences. Regular coffee with friends might deserve a higher ranking on your anti-bucket list than that cruise to Antarctica.
- Remember to prioritise rest and reflection. Sometimes the most rewarding activities involve doing less, not more – allowing you to simply be, without pressure to produce or achieve something of note.
Finding joy in the everyday
Creating our own personal anti-bucket list reminds us that a meaningful life isn't measured by extraordinary achievements, but by regular moments of joy and connection. It gives us the chance to decide what a life well-lived looks like for us, without external pressures and expectations.
Having an anti-bucket list doesn't mean you have to give up on those big dreams, but it does remind us that every day is a day worth living – and worth living well.
Feature image: iStock/kali9
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